I wish I’d known how easy it was to be pregnant

I wish I’d known how easy it was to be pregnant

Back in 2014, I fell pregnant.

Like all first time mothers, I approached each milestone with caution but without any idea of what it really feels like if something goes wrong.

I was just too excited.

And to be honest, I had no reason to be otherwise. I had a great pregnancy and a text book labour. 

Then out popped my perfect girl who is now almost 3, and I love her more than I can ever put into words. 


Looking back over a tough 2 years though, I wish I’d known how good I had it. 

If you’ve not read my older posts, my cycles resumed (seemingly with the help of the devil himself) and I was diagnosed with polyps. I had these sorted though, and things settled down again. 

Then in the last year, I’ve had three miscarriages.

Yes, three.

As I write this, the third one actually started this morning. 

So yeah, things have been pretty shit. 

I regret not embracing pregnancy more

I loved the idea that I was growing my girl, and am happy I had the chance to do it. 

But to be honest, I wanted it over as quickly as possible. 

I didn’t want to be pregnant, I wanted to be a Mum. 

On reflection, I’m sad that I didn’t realise more what a pregnancy without complications felt like.

I naively navigated through the first one, preparing myself for the worst at each point but thinking that it couldn’t never really happen to me.

I wish I’d understood just how heartbroken it feels for your dreams to crumble before your very eyes. 

For scan after scan to show nothing.

For the planned dates to be scratched from the calendars. Or as I put it, to literally flush them down the toilet.

I wish I’d known what it felt like to be deceived by your body. 

And I wish I’d appreciated how it feels to be hit again and again by the same hopeless sense of loss.

Perhaps then, I might not have taken it quite so for granted and wanted it to be over.

My ask to you, pregnant lady

If you’re reading this and are having a healthy pregnancy, please do the following things for me:

  • Enjoy the happiness it’s bringing you
  • Mentally store each moment and the joy it’s bringing you
  • Be excited 
  • Don’t stop living your life – make the most of everything and live the moment
  • Appreciate that others around you might not be so lucky 

And please do me a favour and shut the fuck up moaning about how “fat” you feel, how fed up you are, or how little you are sleeping.

You’re lucky to have a reason for all of those things to be happening to you. 

Good luck x

(Visited 60 times, 1 visits today)
Follow:

Leave a Reply

20 Comments on "I wish I’d known how easy it was to be pregnant"

Notify of
avatar
Sort by:   newest | oldest | most voted
jeremy - thirstydaddy
Guest

sorry to hear this. I went through multiple miscarriages with my ex and know how difficult it can be when you are trying to conceive. hugs. #triumphanttales

Jade - Raw Childhood
Guest

I’m 28 weeks with my third at the moment and although I have had a lot of trouble with the pregnancies (more so this one) I still cherish every moment. It’s a beautiful thing and some people really do forget how lucky they are! Hugs to you, I really hope you get your super sticky one soon, I have everything crossed for you xx #triumphanttales

Jo - Pickle & Poppet
Guest
I’m sorry to hear that you are having your third miscarriage. It is one of the hardest things to go through when you want a baby so badly. We had two before I managed to carry to term. Whilst you’re right that pregnancy is should be enjoyed, it is also something that is very hard on the body and so having a little ‘moan’ about feeling fat or tired isn’t really that bad. It doesn’t mean that they aren’t enjoying their pregnancy, just as when we moan about our children not sleeping, or being terrors occasionally doesn’t mean we don’t… Read more »
Mrs Mummy Harris
Guest
Oh I am so sorry to hear this lovely, I hope writing this has been therapeutic for you. I suffer from PCOS and was told I had a higher risk of miscarriage throughout the whole pregnancy. This put a slight tint on the whole experience and more so when they suspected Ben had Downs Syndrome at one point, but thankfully he was and is a healthy child. I completely understand how you feel with regards to wishing you enjoyed your first pregnancy more. For me, every small twinge or pain was unknown and I panicked so often! Thank you for… Read more »
Musings of a tired mummy...zzz...
Guest

I wish I’d appreciated pregnancy more, yes I had SPD and indigestion but I can barely remember what it was like to carry life inside me :'( #triumphanttales

Heather Keet
Guest

I’m so sorry you are going through this! #GlobalBlogging

MomofTwoLittleGirls
Guest

I’m so sorry for your losses. You are very right, it is easy to take for granted what comes easy to you. Great reminder to cherish every moment. Thanks for linking up to #globalblogging

Lydia C. Lee
Guest

Sorry for the loss and devastation you must be feeling. #GlobalBlogging

One Messy Mama
Guest

Firstly, sorry for your loss, I cannot imagine having to go through one miscarriage, let alone three. Secondly, I can relate to what you are saying about enjoying your pregnancies. This last one for me, was rough and I wished it was over.. Now, I kinda miss it. All those little kicks… Thinking of you and sending much love!! Thanks for linking up with us this week! xx #globalblogging

kristin mccarthy
Guest

My thoughts are with you. It’s a terrible pain to have to go through. I had one long ago and really can not imagine having to go through three. Sending my best.

wpDiscuz